My first tournament as a corner judge

Last Saturday I participated in my very first tournament as a corner judge. This was a small tournament with most of the compeditors being under the age of 14 years old, and low kyu belt ranks.

What a learning experience! It is so different to be sitting on a chair for hours, and keeping alert to wave after wave of students coming up and performing their kata, or doing Ippon kumite. It seems to be SUCH a mental stress rather than a physical one. You find yourself having to assess so many things at the same time, and remembering what you just witnessed from the other contestants, and then making a comparitive decision. The hardest part is choosing the decision in the brief time it takes for the whistle to blow. Sure.. there were moments when the choice was obvious to me from the very first movement made by the white side. I'd see a lack of this or that in one person that revealed to me whom to choose. The worst moments of decision happened when the compeditors were so equally balanced in skill, power, and speed. At one point, there was a real tough choice placed before us, and the 6 judges kept choosing the "tie" option of flags. Those compeditors had to continue fighting for 3 times in a row. It was a tough decision. One person had a different strength than the other, but all in all they were so equal.

One thing that I learned about myself is that I had certain expectations of what I valued as important, and these were not exactly the same as the other judges. I also learned that I would stand by my decisions because they were the most honest ones I could make at that time with the knowledge that I had.

It is difficult to avoid going up to the compeditors after the event, and saying to them "You know.. You would have NAILED that event if only you had done this.." I found myself biting my tongue, and walking away.

There was such a feeling of investing into the training of these young karate-ka. To watch them struggle to calm their nerves, get up and perform their karate, to watch their eyes flipping from crowd, to the judges, to the floor, to the ceiling, as their minds struggled to handle the pressure. I realized how important it is for their development of concentration to have moments when they have to perform in an intensely stressful situation. Each performer walked away the the experience of applying themselves, and the benefits attached to that experience regardless of which medal was handed out.

All in all, it was a learning experience for me, and I enjoyed the whole event.

Results of an informal survey on women martial artists

The results of my informal survey comparing Women to Men in the Martial arts.

I received information from approximately 30 dojo, from 3 continents, North America ( U.S. and Canada), Europe ( England, Ireland, Scotland), and Australia.

Many martial arts styles were represented in this survey:

Shotokan made up about 1/ 4 of the responses. The next largest response came from Tae Kwon do, and then I placed all the other martial arts into a united category. I did not receive many responses from the grappling arts styles such as Judo/ Aikido... so I was unable to make a comparison in hard/ soft styles.

First question:

1. How many women train in your dojo of Kyu rank compared to men?

The overall results from this survey shows that an average dojo will have close to 45% of women compared to men. The New York City-based research firm Simmons Market Research did a survey in America which received a result that 48% women train in martial arts compared to men. Therefore my little survey results are quite close to the official one. Simmons Market Research also found out that “ for the most part, participants are young. Sixty-three percent are between 18 and 34, compared with 25 percent who are between 35 and 49 and 11 percent who are 50 or older. “ **

I did learn something interesting when I looked at the various Martial arts styles:

Overall 45% which translates to about 1 woman to 2 men.

Shotokan 77% which translates to about 3 women to 4 men.

Tae Kwon Do 48% very much meeting the overall average.

Other arts 26% which translates to about 1 woman to 4 men.

Women in North America participate at 51%, while European women are at 37%, and Australian women at 34%.

2. How many women in your dojo are of Dan level?

Overall only 26% of women training in martial arts will achieve Black belt.

A lady has a higher chance to achieve Shodan in Shotokan:

Overall 26%
Shotokan 46%
Other 27%
Tae Kwon Do 4%

According to the numbers that came in the European women ( 34%) achieve Black belt more than North American (30%) or Australian ( 5%).

3. How many Black Belt women are Instructors?

Overall 22%
Shotokan 40%
Other 17%
Tae Kwon Do 0.5%

Again, European women become Instructiors at a higher ratio ( 43%) than North America ( 22%) or Australia ( 10%)


So, according to the above results, the best place for a woman to be if she wants to become a Sensei is training in Shotokan in Europe, and the worst place would be training in Australia in Tae Kwon Do..

I’ve had various Sensei estimate from their experiences that out of 100 new white belts only 1 will achieve Shodan rank level. If I applied the information that I’ve unearthed through this survey, that would mean that (overall) out of 400 new white belt women, only 1 will achieve Black belt.

This informal survey did not have a large data base to draw from, so I would caution anyone from quoting the information contained within it. It was just a fun project. This information is being cross-posted onto a couple of forums by myself.





** quote from http://www.findarticles.com/p/articles/mi_m4021/is_4_25/ai_100751497

What "Shotokan" means to me.....

ShotoKan:

Shoto means "The sound the wind makes whispering through the pine trees", it is the nickname that Sensei Gichin Funakoshi used each time that he did caligraphy. Sensei Gichin never wanted to "name" the style of karate that he, and his students trained in... so whenever someone would ask his students where they trained they would say "at Shoto Kan" (Gichin's place) the same way that I could say "at Sam's house".

Shoto also is the word used to describe one of the swords that the Samurai of Japan would carry around with them always. The Samurai carried two swords.. a long Katana, and a short Shoto. The shoto sword was ALWAYS on the Samurai's person. He would leave his Katana by the door, but would wear his Shoto, even he went to bed.

What does Shotokan mean to me? That I need to bring myself back to nature, and realize the powerful potential within me. Just like a wind will wear down a mountain through erosion, I can reach my goals through my persistance. Like the pine tree I have to be strong against the force of the wind, but also I need to bend with it. I need to value, and be faithful to the teachings of the founder of my art, Sensei Gichin Funakoshi. Like the Shoto sword, I need to carry my karate with me everyday, and never put it down.

Another interest

Aha.. as if I'm not busy enough. I decided to put an online survey out there in 4 different forums asking questions to gather up the results and see what the percentage is of women training in martial arts compared to men. I also wanted to see if there was any difference by how many women achieve black belt compared to men.

I think that it should be interesting to see the numbers of this informal survey. It will not be totally accurate, but it will give me some sort of view of what is happening out there in the world. I'll be sure to update this blog with my results.

Sudden new interest

I've become curious about the history of women in the martial arts. So now I have started travelling down that path.

Using the internet as a source of information is a tricky place to be. People can place anything they want down on a website (with or without any supporting facts.) The information can be skewed to show whatever personal bias that person has within themselves. However, the same thing can be said of books found in the library. What makes the information in a book more believable? Is it the fact that it is in permanent print?

Ah... I choose to walk down the path of history and see how recently women have studied martial arts with the support of men, how women are being treated in current times (as warriors), and perhaps forecast what a woman could expect in the future. You are more than welcome to join me in my anthropological journey... but I am sure that it will not be a short one.

Easter Sunday

All the festivities over, the easter eggs hidden, and found, all the clean up done, the big meal made, eaten, everything settled.. and I find myself wishing that I could go somewhere peaceful to train in karate as a gift to me.

I'm sitting here thinking of ways to create a space where I can train for a short while without interruptions, but that is not a possibility in my household.. far too many distractions, and needs that just erupt as soon as you actually try to concentrate. Like right now for instance.. I sit down to type a few words on my blog... and wouldn't you know it.. one of my kids has to have my attention for the important revelation that they would like to have some juice.

I can hear my teenager's music thump, thump, thumping from upstairs.. there is no section of the house, or yard that doesn't have one of my kids, or one of their friends present.

Later tonight, after I have put all the younger ones to bed, I will dedicate that time for push ups, sit ups, stretching, weight lifting, and arm/shin conditioning. I'll just have to wait until tomorrow to do kata, and practice my basics.

Having chosen to have seven children has it's joys, demands, sacrifices, and expectations. Since I went down this pathway 21 years ago, I have accepted all of the positives, and negatives of having a large family. I haven't regretted my choice. However, moments like today where I long to be able to train in karate in peace, I feel the crowdedness of the house. I keep reminding myself that it will not be very long before I will feel the empty nest syndrome.

Oh dear.. there it is again.. I just heard a loud crash, with a bunch of scattering things.. "Nothing broke!" yells my daughter.. I'd better go check what is happening.

I haven't had much time to type

End of the school year issues, spring break vacation, sick members of my family, extra training in karate have taken up my every spare minute. Computer time? It had to wait in line for any attention.. and most days I barely had time to check my email.

I've been learning about judging for tournaments. The various expectations, terminologies, qualifying, and non qualifying things. So many points to cover, so many aspects to be aware of.. What a responsibility!

I have rarely thought twice about those judges who precide over the tournament ring, and of all the things necessary for their presence. What a job!

As I contemplate the position of having to judge with equanimity, I can see how difficult it is to be a good judge. I can more fully appreciate the gift of service that those faithful black belts who carry the flags have given to the future generation of karate ka. I am quite appreciative, and filled with gratitude.

I guess that it is the same thing as when I became a Mom. I never appreciated all the hard work, dedication, and knowledge needed to provide a child with a good home until I was given the responsibility myself.

A great big thank you to all those who have provided the avenue of tournaments to those karate ka who value the chance of performing in that environment.

The one armed karate ka

I was having issues with my left arm, and shoulder so I went for some therapy. I was told to "lay off of the martial arts" for awhile to allow that shoulder to heal.

This gave me some concerns, since I enjoy martial arts, and that I didn't wish to allow the rest of my body to lose what I had gained. I managed to strike a bargain and placed my left arm in a sling to isolate it from training.

I performed all of my basics, and kata one-armed for my classes, and I learned SO much about karate.

a) I learned that I was capable of separating the goal from the technique. If I wanted to do a downward block, I could just as easilly use the opposite hand, or my knee.. it didn't have to always be the textbook version that I've been doing up until now.

b) I learned that you have to speed up the movements if you want to block/counter with only one arm. The block has to be more of a strong flicking feeling rather than a solid block to allow the time to pull your fist back for the counter.

c) I learned how important that pull back hand (Hikite) really is! There was no balance without the pull back hand. All of the power of my techniques suddenly had to come from hip vibration or rotation. I became exhausted very quickly.

d) I felt the open-ness of my left side, therefore I went into fighting stance with my right side forwards. It felt awkward.. the left has always been my preference. This alerted me to the fact that I might like to train so that both sides are comfortable when I defend myself.

I don't know how long I have to let my left arm recuperate, and heal, but I do know that I appreciate all the lessons that I have learned from this moment of my training.

Soreness...

It almost feels like I've hit my stride physically. I train with intensity, push myself through the whole class, and yet I'm not struck down to a sore non-moving slug when I get home. Sure.. I feel slightly sore, but it's not the same kind of total stiffness that I used to feel. It's almost like my body has accepted the fact that I'm going to ask this of it every time that I train, and has said "O.k... if that's the way it's going to be.. I'll cope somehow."

I remember how horribly stiff I was one day after karate class. I came home and saw the three cement steps up to my back porch. I stood there for a couple of minutes trying to figure out how I was going to lift my foot that high. I had to figure out for a second that my arms still had some energy left to help.. not much though. I had to grab the porch railing and pull my body up each stair. I swear that it took a good 5 minutes for me to grunt, groan, and pull myself up into the house.

I remember how my poor husband was so energy-less after class one day that he had trouble pushing the gas pedal of the car. We had to take a good 15 minute rest break before we drove home. We just sat there in the car feeling so tired that we couldn't move, or didn't even want to talk.

Oh heavens.. talking about energyless. I remember my white belt test for Kyokushin. I ended up laying on the ground, staring at the ceiling, feeling so empty of energy that I had difficulties remembering my name. The walls swirled around me, as I felt the earth twirling under my back. Opening my eyelids took effort, and concentration. I remember seeing my Sensei looking down at me saying "Are you alright?" All I could say was a very weak "no.." It took me 3 days of resting to recuperate from that test. I would fall asleep everytime that I stopped moving... it didn't matter what time of day.

It's nice to feel just a small amount of soreness from training rather than a total debilitation.

The second part of my interview in Combat magazine

Yes, the second half of my interview has now been published. You can read it by clicking here:

www.raynerslanetkd.com/downloadables/zips/Combat_Panel_March06.zip

I have to say that I'm totally astounded, and thrilled to have participated in this Combat Panel. It is quite a wonderful chance to contribute my thoughts to the martial art community.

I surprised myself yesterday...

I was instructed to take one move from any kata that I wanted to.. and find an application for it.

I decided to take the opening move of the kata, Jion. I stood there, holding my hands in front of me. My mind swirling with "O.K... which way is the power going? What am I doing? Why am I doing it?" All of my thoughts were blank.. just blank.

So.. I decided that since my feet, knees, and hips will help give me a hint as to what I'm doing.. I paid extra attention to what they were doing. My left foot went back, and my body sunk down using gravity as a force. The power of the technique was heading down.. not sideways.. but down..

Yet.. my hands were doing a circular (almost sideways double block).. I suddenly asked myself "What if?" "What if the power was actually being sent inwards, not outwards? That would mean that I was going in, and down strong enough to break something.. "

I gave myself permission to entertain the thought that I was stronger than I really was, and I realized that if I grabbed my opponents oncoming wrist with my left hand, my right hand would do a hammerfist strike on his elbow at the same time that my left arm was violently pulling the arm twisting, and downwards against the power of the hammerfist strike. Adding my body weight dropping with this move.. the chances are that I could break, or horribly hyperextend the arm of my opponent.

I stood there in a state of elation that I had figured this out.. even IF it was not actually applicable... I was also shocked that I could think so violently with such calm reserve.. almost like a doctor describing surgery. Is this still "Me"? What happened to the person that I remember being.. the one who begged her father to release one of the fish that he had caught from the line because she thought that the fish was looking at her so sadly?? I still remember the frustrated growl that my Dad gave as he released this fish so stop the tears of his daughter.. and then we saw it floating on the water a couple of feet away from the boat.

Injuries and karate

I've been thinking alot about a friend of mine that is hampered in his efforts to train by injuries.

Can one train in karate when injured? Is it a smart thing to do?

The very first moment that I walked into the dojo, I started with a previously damaged right hip. It didn't bother me until I attempted my first roundhouse kick. I lifted my right leg, and pain shot through me. Just lifting my leg to the side was enough, I didn't even kick out yet. I had to take it slow, and easy. I used the wall for balance, and guiding my leg with my hand I gently lifted it into position as far as possible (until pain started), held it, and brought it back down to relax. Without being consciously aware, I was doing physical therapy on myself.

With time, persistence, and effort, I have been able to increase the flexibility of my hips/legs. I can perform a roundhouse kick without pain, at about chest height. I feel that this was of great benefit to me. Instead of my flexiblity lessening as I progressed in age, I've increased, and developed myself.

On the other hand... Lately, I've injured my left shoulder. Don't ask me how. I believe that I had done a technique improperly with full power, and somehow pulled one of the muscles connected to my bicep muscle. Although I've been gentle on my left arm for the past month and a half, it doesn't seem to be improving. The injury that I sustained on my right wrist two years ago ( a sprained wrist) still rears up and complains as I train. I've also injured my right middle knuckle on a punching bag, and there are times when my knuckle will swell, and make crackling noises.

So... I've gained in some areas, and lost in others. I believe that I'm not alone. As more and more people train in karate into their mature years, they have to balance the benefits of training, with the fact that injuries can, and may happen as we train.

How do we know if we can keep training with an injury?

For those moments when we fall, or get smacked hard by our opponent, and we feel that nasty feeling that something went "OUCH" more than it should have, I present this quote:

"Robert Nirschl, M.D., assistant professor of orthopedics at Georgetown
University, in Washington, D.C., offers this advice: "Look for signs of
inflammation such as swelling, redness, tenderness, fever--generalized or
local--or pain that persists with or without continued activity." Any of
these signs--or others, such as decreased mobility or weight-bearing ability
of the affected limb, or a "popping" or "snapping" sound--indicates the need
for immediate treatment."

Should you take aspirin, or other pain relievers when training with an injury?

"Mirkin went even further in cautioning injured athletes about using pain
relievers at all. "They stop the pain," he explained, "but the
prostaglandins that cause the pain are part of the healing process. There
have been studies indicating that blocking prostaglandins may inhibit
healing. . . . You're better off taking nothing." He recommends rest and
keeping in shape during recovery with a sport that stresses uninjured parts
of the body."

Should you use one of those creams like Tiger Balm?

"Experts are even less enthusiastic about topical treatments such as creams,
ointments and liniments in treating injured muscles. FDA categorizes these
treatments as "topical counterirritants": "externally applied substances
that cause irritation or mild inflammation of the skin for the purpose of
relieving pain in muscle, joints, or viscera distal to the site of
application." In other words, the burning of your skin takes your mind off
your aching muscles. As Geismar puts it, "It's like pinching your big toe so
that you forget about your headache."

There is no scientific proof that topical treatments, even those that contain
aspirin, ease aching muscles, though the rubbing or massaging of the area can
itself be soothing. Since the medications often contain irritants, such as
menthol, the labels caution against bandaging the applied area tightly or for
too long. "

So what can you do if you injure yourself?

The R.I.C.E. method will help. R. is Rest, I. is Ice, C is Compression, and E is Elevate. Do not Ice the area longer than 10 or 15 minutes.

What is the goal in training with injuries?

I would suggest that we adapt to the need of the injured part with an attitude of humbleness at accepting the truth that we are not invincible. Perhaps one could tie a colored ribbon around the damaged limb to remind their kumite partners that they are continuing training to keep up their skills, but that care needs to be given to any techniques sent in that direction until that limb heals. Exercise is good for the limb. It promotes blood flow, and strengthens the muscles around the injured part. It would not be a good thing to stress the injured part to the point where damage is increased rather than decreased.

We need to be aware that healing takes longer for the older body. A young karate ka can submit his/her body to some strenous regime, and survive, even thrive. An older karate ka has to change the type of demand on his/her body. Doing one type of training on one day, and then giving that part of the body a rest, and focusing on another part of the body the next day. This would be similar to weight lifters that do Upper body training on Monday, and Lower body training on Tuesday.

I would encourage prevention of possible injury as the main focus of a karate ka. "Not only should your entire fitness program start out slowly and progress
gradually, but each day's regimen should include a warm-up that gently brings
your body up to a level where it can do vigorous exercise, and then a
cool-down to return to a normal activity level." Also, very importantly, make sure that you are well hydrated before you exercise. Your body needs water to move well. One should be sure to have had at least 2 glasses of water about 2 hours before training, and another glass of water 15 minutes before training.

Train hard..yes.. but train smart!

All quotes taken from:
http://www.fda.gov/bbs/topics/CONSUMER/CON00087.html

Using Japanese, Korean, or Chinese terminology

I've been thinking about how martial art students are asked to train, and learn all the difficult stances, kicks, strikes, and patterns, and in addition to this, (in some dojo) they are asked to know all of these things in both their native language, AND in Japanese (Korean, Chinese, etc. depending on their art). Of course, I had to ask myself if I thought that it was a worthwhile effort to learn everything in Japanese. I like to be in agreement with what I've been asked to do. There are alot of reasons why people have learned the Eastern terminology. One reason is that it is good to be familiar with the words in case you wish to compete or train internationally. I can see the value in that.. even if each country will have a different accent to the term Tsuki.. there is a chance that there would be interactive communication when placed together. Personally, I do not ever assume that I will be at such a high level that I'd be interacting internationally with other karate-ka... other than on the internet. Another reason is that it continues the tradition from the country that originated the martial art. (similar to how latin, and Greek terms are used in music, or French is used in Ballet) I like this idea, but it doesn't motivate me to put forth the effort to learn all the complex terms. For me, learning Japanese is a way to train my mind. I have to find a way to learn, and remember those words, what they represent, and when/how to use them. As a mom, I rarely get academic stimulation. It has been shown that one has to use their memory, and mind to keep it young and active. "As we learn new skills and concepts, the brain sparks development of synaptic connections--the electrical /chemical circuits that link neurons, the brain cells. Each cell in the brain can potentially be connected to thousands of others. The more connections, the more dense the brain, and the greater the intellectual capacity. For most of us, the brain is thoroughly stimulated well into our 50s thanks to jobs, continuing education, relationships, child raising and so forth. But people who become less mentally active as they grow older often don't receive--or seek-the stimulation needed to continue forming synapses. Karlene Ball, a psychology professor at the University of Alabama at Birmingham, worked as a lead researcher in a major federally funded study of people aged 64-96. The study proved beyond a doubt that the cognitive functions of the elderly can be enhanced through demanding activities that forced them to reason and react quickly. Better news still: A follow-up 5 years later showed thai participants retained their cognitive abilities--even though they hadn't performed any practice exercises." http://www.findarticles.com/p/articles/mi_m0FKA/is_1_66/ai_111572861 Training in Karate is the elixer of youth for the mind of a person, we are constantly challenged to learn, react, and learn more! Adding the study, and memorizing of kata, history of the art, and it's founder, and learning Japanese/Korean/Chinese terms enhances the mental training offered to us to help us keep sharp, and focused.

Kung Fu.. the original series

I was able to borrow a 6 DVD set of all the original episodes of "Kung Fu" the t.v. series starring David Carradine as Caine.

This was the first time that I've ever seen the show. Sure, I knew about the famous "snatch the pebble from my hand, Grasshopper" quote, and a couple of other little scenes just from watching other entertainment. I was astounded by the quality of the show. I feel that this is a creation that will transcend into the future. The magic of the combination of wonderful cinematography, poignant acting, great directing, awesome scripts, and storylines, amazing sets.. oh gosh.. I was entranced.

I found that I enjoyed each part of the series. I LOVED the flashbacks, I found myself looking forwards to them. I could see a thread of a positive moral lesson contained in each episode. One was able to see the worst in people, and at the same time you could see the BEST of people, and in the center of it all, solid, and calm as a pillar in a swirling ocean was Caine.

The deeper inner thoughts of a martial artist striving to follow the "way", "Do", or "Tao" were poetically expressed in simple words that would be difficult to understand if you haven't trained in the arts. My children turned to me more than once saying "What did his Sensei say? That made no sense..." I would just smile, and say "Oh.. it's just martial arts stuff.. You have to think about it."

What I found MOST interesting is how little "martial arts" there actually was in the show itself. The martial arts part was not the main draw of this show. It was there.. sure... but there were many times when it only made up less than 5 percent of the show. I found that I ended up that I didn't really care how well performed, or accurate the fight scenes were, I was so involved in the storyline... However, I have to admit that more than once, my heart surged with the action, and I admired the ability of the artists performing. I really enjoyed the fact that they put some of the more complex movements into slow motion. I would name the techniques as they happened "AH! A backfist to the head, followed by an elbow strike to the middle.. oh wow.. look he swirled him around, and did something that I haven't seen before.."

I saw the quality of the show improved with each successive episode, and when I watched the last show on the set, I found myself longing to see more. My found that the director that appealed the most to me was Robert Butler. There was a special feel to his work that rang within me.

My favorite episode from the first season was "Chains" . Robert Butler directed it, and it aired in March 1973. "Imprisoned in an army outpost, Caine escapes - chained to his hulking, mountain-man cellmate.... and pursued by a relentless sergeant determined to collect the $10,000 reward offered for Caine's capture." I found myself reacting to each moment of the show from the very beginning when I first meet the mountain-man, all the way to the end of the show.

I am grateful for the gift of this show's existence. It is no wonder that it has inspired so many martial artists of today to start walking the path.

How long does it take to get a black belt?

"How long would it take me to get a black belt (or it's equivalent)?

As long as it takes, no longer and rarely sooner."

from http://www.shaolin.com/shaolin_faq.aspx#anchor176742

Food for thought.

The first question that I hear from a person considering entering the path of martial arts is "How long before black belt?" I believe that this is the prevailing attitude, but it goes totally against the real goal of training in the arts. If the color of black is what is desired then the easiest method of obtaining that is to go to the local Martial arts store, and pick one up for less than $10. However, I believe that what the person is really hoping for is to have the skills of a black belt, and that will only come through personal effort, dedication, and training. It is really up to the person as to how long it takes. Although.. the body can only strengthen, and learn at a certain rate. Today, I can do 2 push ups, tomorrow perhaps 3.. with alot of consistence I can get up to 10 push ups in about a week. It would be rather impossible to suddenly be able to do 100 push ups after only a day of training... unless you really, really cheat.

Is it worth it though? To lower the amount of expectation so that you can get that black belt around your waist sooner? Not in my eyes. The belt does not make the artist.. it is the artist that brings worth to the belt.

I'm in Combat magazine.

To my joy, I have been included in the panel of 6 students that have been interviewed by Sensei Stuart Anslow of Great Britain. My answers have been published in the "Combat Panel" section of Combat magazine.


You can download this section at:

http://www.raynerslanetkd.com/downloadables/zips/Combat_Panel_Feb06.zip

I guess I just like kicking alot

When we arrived to our dojo this week, we found out that Sensei had car troubles, and wasn't coming to class. Our lead belt was going to take over.

As we were warming up, Sempai asked us " Is there anything in particular that you would like to work on in this class? Anything that you'd like to develop? Is there a kata you'd like to work on? or a technique?"

We waited in silence for a few seconds as we stretched.. then I put up my hand.

I suggested "I'd like to work on my kicks, Sempai."

The students around me did a sudden intact of breath, and I saw wide eyes all around me.

"Ah" said Sempai teasingly "That's a good idea.. 5,000 kicks would make the class go by quickly.."

I blinked in confusion " I just find that it's more difficult to do a good kick because I have to balance on one leg when I do the technique.. but when I punch
I have both feet on the ground."

"Aha!" jumped Sempai on my answer "You want to do balance exercises. I can provide that. 5,000 kicks balancing on one leg.. that sounds wonderful. Any more suggestions Mireille? This is shaping up to be a great class."

All of the black, and brown belts started laughing.

My husband chuckled, and said to me in one of those LOUD whispers "Honey.. I think that I'd quit talking now.."

This brought even more laughter from the class. Since it was all in good fun, I didn't mind.. but I did wonder what class was going to be like now that I had opened my big mouth.

So class happened.. but it wasn't as bad as all that.

Sure.. we worked on our roundhouse kick, and front kick, but it wasn't that awful. Sempai just helped us work on fixing those little details that smooth out the kick, and helps you maintain your support foot.

Sempai noticed a definate difference in our kicks by the end of class. Many of us had become aware of what we were doing with our support foot, and using it more effectively.

Sempai called us into kata formation, and then said "Since a certain new Shodan black belt wants to work on her kicks, I decided that the class will do a
kick with each move of the kata."

All of the students of the dojo teasingly grumbled about how they were going to repay me for my suggestion after class. I put my hand up and asked Sempai if I could be dismissed from class a good 5 minutes before everyone else so that I can have a head start of running away from them... or could he please shoot me now.

"Shooting is too quick a punishment" called out one of the brown belts "We need something more long lasting."

I just turned and gave him a pretend "frightened" look which made everyone chuckle.

We did our kata.. and I found it FUN. Adding a kick to each move was challenging mentally, and physically. I had to adjust my weight with each move. It changed
the feel of the kata, and the rhythm. It seemed that the other students had fun too. At least their faces were smiling at the end of class.

One of the more experienced black belts came up to me and said "Well.. I never thought that I'd ever see it happen.. that a student would request to do work on
their kicks during class! In the 15 years that I've been training, I've never seen it happen before.. until now.. until you. You are something else!"

All that I could do is blush.

I think that my husband is going to invest into some duct tape for his loud mouthed wife.

I'm far from the top...

One of my favorite things to do when I have a few moments of freedom from my responsibilities as a mother, and martial artist is to surf the net, and learn about various things (mainly karate based information)

I stumbled across this biography of Sensei Gichin Funakoshi, and found an interesting challenge in it.

"Gichin Funakoshi was a humble man. He preached and practiced an essential humility. He did not preach the humility of virtue, but a basic humility of a man who is rooted in the true perspective of things, full of life and awareness. He lived at peace with himself and with his fellow men.

Whenever the name of Gichin Funakoshi is mentioned, it brings to mind the parable of "A Man of Tao ( Do ) and a Little Man". As it is told, a student once asked, "What is the difference between a man of Tao and a little man?" The sensei replies, "It is simple. When the little man receives his first dan (degree or rank), he can hardly wait to run home and shout at the top of his voice to tell everyone that he has obtained his first dan. Upon receiving his second dan, he will climb to the rooftops and shout to the people. Upon receiving his third dan, he will jump in his automobile and parade through town blowing the horn, telling one and all about his third dan".

The sensei continues, "When the man of Tao receives his first dan, he will bow his head in gratitude. Upon receiving his second dan, he will bow his head and his shoulders. Upon receiving his third dan, he will bow at the waist and quietly walk alongside the wall so that people will not see him or notice him".

Funakoshi was a man of Tao. He placed no emphasis whatsoever on competitions, record breaking or championships. He placed emphasis on individual self-perfection. He believed in the common decency and respect that one human being owes another. He was the master of masters. "

http://www.shotokai.com/ingles/bios/funakos2.html

Oh gosh.. what was the first thing that I did when I achieved Shodan? I contacted as many of my friends, and family as soon as I could to share my joy. I didn't just bow my head in gratitude. I remember laying there on my bed unable to sleep with a big smile on my face thinking "Unbelievable! I'm a Black belt." In my defense, I didn't contact others to brag, or boast, but more to allow them to join me in a deep important moment of my life.

Hopefully, by the time I achieve Nidan, I will accept that rank change with just a bow, and a willingness to accept anonimity because I am MORE than my belt rank.

Karate goals for 2006

Each year I make karate commitments. These aren't "resolutions", as in the normal goals that many people do (watch their weight, stop smoking, and such), they are more like physical karate goals for the year. I started training in karate in February of 2002. I had no goals then. I was introduced to the world of martial arts. In 2003, my goal was very simple. I just wanted to continue training, and not give into that feeling of staying home instead of going to the dojo. I achieved that goal, and made sure that I didn't miss any classes that year. In 2004, my goals were: Kihon: I wanted to work on that "twist" at the end of my techniques. Sometimes when I'm in a hurry, it disappears. I'd like it to become a natural movement. I also want to work on my balance. Kata: I'd like to learn the Tekki (Naihanchi) kata. I've read on the internet that these kata are being overlooked because they aren't early on the testing list. Kumite: I'd like to focus on what my hips are doing during kumite, and less on my arms/ hands. I'd like to develop my hip rotation more. Result: I had to slow down my basics for awhile to allow my muscles to learn to "twist" at the end of my techniques, but it didn't take too long for that twist to become natural. In fact, I can now choose IF I want to twist, and how far I want to twist. My balance has improved a hundred fold. It has been noticed that it is getting harder for my opponent to find me off-balanced now. I did not learn the Tekki (Naihanchi) kata. My kumite goal didn't work with my Kihon goal. Since I was trying to focus on the twist in my hands, I had to let go of focusing on my hips for the majority of the year. I found out that hip rotation is best worked on during basics rather than in sparring. The goals for 2005: Kihon: To apply more power when performing a technique during the basics part of class. Kata: To work on my turns so that they are quicker, and more controlled. Kumite: To flow more when I attack, and to do more than 3 techniques one after the other in a natural way. I was able to increase my power by adding upper body weight training into my practice at home. I'm still developing the turns so that they are fast, balanced, and controlled. I've been able to flow more in kumite, but that affected my targeting some. So now that the year 2006 is coming. This does not mean that all the other goals are unimportant, but that I will adjust my focus into other aspects of my training. I think that I want to work on my mental, and spiritual strength this year. Kihon: I want to find that central space within me as I do my basics. Keeping my mind centered on my tanden, and attacking with my whole body, not just my arms, and legs. Kata: I want to focus on keeping Zanchin throughout the kata in spite of all the interruptions, and distractions. Kumite: I want to keep a calm interior that is alert, and willing to do what is necessary to react to what is coming in a flexible way, not being locked into this or that combination. Hopefully this year's goals all will support each other.

Starting my new path as Black

It's been a few weeks now since I achieved the rank of Shodan. I'm still trying to get my head around the idea. Whenever Sensei says something like "The black belts will spread out in the dojo.." I still find myself standing there hesitating until I remember that I am also a black belt.

I don't feel any different: the same issues that I was working on before my test are still being worked on now...

I just attended my first high level seminar that was filled wall to wall with black belts. We did two days of kumite training. To my joy, I was able to keep up with the majority of the complicated maneuvers that we were doing. O.K. sometimes I wasn't graceful, or competent with it, but I knew deep down that it was experience that would remedy this. I walked away from that seminar feeling rather happy with myself.

I've become more aware of the little things that I want to improve in my performance... such as my balance, direction of power, etc. I'm glad that I have the rest of my life to work on this.

Officially received the rank of Shodan

I passed! I received my black belt last night.

What a joy to place that new stiff obi around my waist. The ends of it stuck out sideways on my waist like one of those old days bad guy moustaches.

I thought quite seriously about what my first act will be when I attend my next class as a Shodan, because it will set the tone for the rest of my experience.

I decided that I would go get the broom, and sweep the floor as my first act as a black belt.

First of all, it reminds me that I need to remember my roots, and that I am not better or worse than anyone else. (Seek perfection of Character.)

Second, it reminds me that it is only through constant diligence on the simple basic things that I will excel at the higher more difficult things. (Be Faithful.)

Third, it reminds me to be careful to clean the whole floor and not just pieces of it. (Endeavor to excel.)

Fourth, I am reminded that Sensei Gichin Funakoshi worked as a janitor in a school, but was the Sensei of royalty, so therefore I should not judge others, but to treat everyone with the same respect. (Respect others)

Fifth, although a broom can be used as a weapon, it's main function is to bring cleaning, and health to the environment. I wish to focus on the fact that the skills that I have developed through my training is to be used in a positive way. (Refrain from violent behaviour.)

My Shodan test

My Shodan test
The day is done, the excitement is settled, and now I can sit
down and write about the seminar/ testing.
Yes, I’m tired.
I walked into the gym in the morning, and within a few
stances I noticed that my legs were not doing well. My thighs
were cramping up.  I accepted that fact, and decided to warm
up with stretching rather than kata.
I started greeting people who came into the gym to help them
feel welcomed, and comfortable.  I remembered how
frightened I was going to my first seminar, and so I thought it
would be nice to help them feel “at home”.  Also, I thought
that introducing myself before the seminar to these people
could help them be less frightened of my skin condition if we
ever had to spar together.
The morning class started with basics.  We went through the
various techniques, and stances.  It was quite interesting to
learn how much more I need to work on my side thrust kick. I
enjoyed it alot!
The Master was very kind.  He looked at me with a very
satisfied, and happy look more than once.  There was a
moment when he came up behind me when I was moving
forwards in stance, and suddenly grabbed my hips to place
them lower, and more forwards.  Since I wasn’t expecting the  
movement, I burst out with a squeal at the surprise, and then
with a giggle.  All the Sensei(s) chuckled at my innocent  
reaction.
My husband was my partner through the whole morning for
every exercise.  At one point, Sensei asked the groups to
stagger the lines by having each second group of two move
forwards.  I was watching the end of the line to see whether
we had to move or not.  When I realized that “yes” we had to
move.  I said “Osu”.. and quickly sent my hands forwards, and
pushed my husband on the chest lightly.  The sudden
movement shocked him and he sent out a squeal of surprise
too.  All the Sensei, and the rest of the students started
laughing. My family seems to be the noisest karate students!
So the morning class went by so fast, it was already time for
lunch, and I was saddened by the fact that the day was half
over already.  Most of the people left the gym to go eat out,
but I chose to stay, sit on the bleachers, and rest my
cramping thighs. I spent a good hour massaging them.
My husband went out for lunch, and bought me a vegetarian
submarine sandwich.  The sweetheart!
I had so many people asking me if I felt nervous about my
upcoming test.  I had to answer that “No, I’m not worried at
all,  I feel ready. I just hope that my legs hold up.”
I  had time during the lunch break to help a green belt learn
that he has to punch with the two knuckles of his fist rather
than the bent wrist that he had be using.  I felt even better
about that! I just helped him understand about the danger of
injury if he kept doing what he was doing. Awesome.
Class started.  We did kata... My favorite!  
The Kata class ended.. and we had a few minutes to gather
ourselves before testing.  I saw my kyokushin Sensei
standing up in the bleachers.  I ran over to where he was
leaning over the rail smiling at me.  I jumped up and down in
happiness and greeted him.  I couldn’t really talk to him
though at that point. It was time to test.
We 4 Shodan testing students got called up.  I just couldn’t
understand what Sensei  was saying...  I heard Sanbon
Tsuki.. O.K... I know what that is!  So
I did it.. but I forgot to listen for how many repetitions I had to
do.  I even forgot to kiai on the last punch.  I went one
technique too far.  My Sensei said to me “
switch legs.. you only need to do 3 of them.”  “Osu!” I
answered switching legs.. but then my arm was wrong.  
Sensei only told me to switch legs.. not arms.. Oh gosh I got
more flustered.  So I just went into yoi for a second, looked at
the person next to me, and then went into the same position
as them.  “Come on! Focus!  Why did you train so hard to let
nerves take it away from you? You made a mistake.. now get
past that..” I said to myself.  From that moment on, I was all
there.  My basics went very smoothly after that.  It was TOO
easy. I calmed down, and all just flowed!
It was the Brown belt’s turn for kata.  We went up in teams of
two.  We 2 ladies were together.  Sensei told us to do
Heian Yondan.  I went through that kata with joy.. but my
thighs were feeling the stress.  I ignored them.. told them that
they have no choice but to keep going because I’m testing
and they can hurt later.  My kata came out at my best.  Sensei
just sent us to sit down.
Then we went around the list of testing students doing their
kata, and it was our turn again. This time we had
to do Bassai Dai.  At one point near the beginning, my left
thigh muscle ( My left leg was in the front on front stance)
gave out on me, and I felt myself slipping.   Quickly, I
demanded performance.. caught myself with that left foot,
and continued on.  The kiai points felt like heaven because I
would open my mouth to kiai, and almost gulp in air to
sustain me until the next kiai point.  
I handled the sparring part with more finesse than I thought I
would.  I was quite happy with my effort.
Well, it is on that note that the testing ended.
I made mistakes.. yes.. but I got past them... and kept going.
I don't know what the results are. They weren't announced
there at the test.  As soon as I know I will tell you.

Countdown! 1!!!!!!!!

I kept busy today. I went to my kid's parent teacher interviews at their elementary school all morning. Then I went grocery shopping in the afternoon to stock up for the weekend. I had to bring all the housework up to a done level. The day went by peacefully, quickly, and without any moments of "Oh my gosh! I'm one day away from my belt test." I didn't even stop to write about the upcoming event in my blog until now. I'm ready now to think about karate.

What a challenge cross training is! I really only joined the Kyokushin karate dojo for the needed exercise. I couldn't afford to join a second Shotokan dojo, or to join a health spa. The Kyokushin classes were free of charge, and they have a big focus on body conditioning.

I expected to remain a white belt in that dojo because of the fact that I was training in Shotokan, and that training was louder in my body than any of the kyokushin that I was doing. What do I mean? Well.. although a rising head block is a rising head block there is a different way of applying it when one compares Shotokan to Kyokushin.

So then started my learning process as to how each and every movement, and stance is used differently in Kyokushin. I could lean on my Shotokan background, and experience a little to get the main idea, but then I had to fine tune the way that I did my techniques. I'd try to imitate what my Kyokushin Sensei wanted, but since I was almost hard wired for a certain straight linear movement, my arms almost refused to go in a circular manner.

I struggled in kyokushin class to get the direct stepping happening in my legs rather than the C stepping which now seemed so natural to me. Months and months of slow training to get my leg to go direct. I'd run up to my Kyokushin Sensei, demonstrate a few steps and say "Do I have it yet?" He'd smile and shake his head to the negative. Nope, my foot always came into the other as I moved forwards. I watched myself in the mirror.. you could even see the hesitant fight in my legs each time that I moved. There seemed to be a war of FORWARDS! IN! FORWARDS! IN! happening with each step.

Kata! Oh gosh kata! Pinan Sono Ichi is the same embusen as Heian Shodan, but you have to move differently. It has a different feel to it, a different timing, really it has a different "music". It's like listening to the song "Three blind mice" played in Jazz style rather than classical style. For the first 6 months I would mish mash the styles. I'd start off in Shotokan, but at the end of the kata, I would turn into a most wonderful Kyokushin backstance. I'd stand there thinking "This is right, but it's not "right".. how come it feels wrong? It's a good stance! OH oh! I'm doing Shotokan!" So then my body would click into a Shotokan backstance like one of those transformer robots.. feet, leg, hip, torso, arms... click, click, click. AH! That's better.

I was totally lost when it came to Kyokushin sparring. The constant movement.. the attitude.. the idea of unbalancing your opponent.. Oh! and you have to get so close to the person you are fighting sometimes! Distance was always difficult for me to figure out when I was only doing 1 type of art... but to do two arts that demand different ways.. OUCH!

I perservered. I kept trying. I found out that now I have to learn double the amount of kata since I'm doing two arts.

In Shotokan I learned the Heian (5), Tekki (2), Bassai (2), Kanku (2), Empi, Jion, Chinte, Jutte, Hangestu, Gankaku, and Wan kan.

In Kyokushin I learned Kihon (3), Shiho Tsuki (3), Taikyoku (3), Sakugi Taikyoku(3), Pinan (2), Yangstu, Sanchin, and a Bo kata.

37 Kata so far.. and I'm not done. 37 Kata in only 3 years of training! *Insert stunned swear word of choice here*

Well... I was warned before I started learning Kyokushin that it is a FAR harder path in martial arts to try to travel in two styles at the same time. I didn't want to lose the Shotokan art that I have come to know, and love. I didn't want to lose the beauty of the Kyokushin art that I was experiencing. Also there were moments when Shotokan revealed to me the hidden answers to what was happening in Kyokushin, and times when Kyokushin revealed to me the practical applications of my Shotokan.

So! I keep cross training. I'm going for Shodan in Shotokan, but I hold a 7th Kyu level in Kyokushin. That's who I am.. and I just accept the positives, and negatives of the whole thing.

Countdown!! 2.....

I have been receiving so much support from people concerning my upcoming black belt test. People that I didn't think would be interested are inquiring as to how I'm coping with the anxiety of the upcoming test. Wow.. Not too many people really worried about me when I was going for the lower kyu ranks.. ha ha ha. I was far less ready for those tests.. especially my white belt test. It's nice to get their emails of encouragement, and to have people stop me to wish me the best. Wow.. the outpouring of concern is wonderful. I feel like a Queen walking amoung the population right now. One of the parents of my dojo found out that I was testing for black, and the look in her eyes just shifted to one of deep awe. Oh gosh.. awe? Sometimes I think that it's just a daydream, really, and that I'll wake up in a couple of days and realize that truth.

Thinking back to those first days of training when I saw brown belt as an impossibility for me to achieve. I remember watching the brown belts go up front of class, and do so many things that I just couldn't see myself accomplishing within my lifetime: Kumite, the more difficult kata like Kanku Dai, and combinations... I was having troubles keeping my front knee bent, and holding stance for longer than 2 seconds. Oooo.. the burning in my thigh muscles just demanded that I pull out of stance, the pain in my ankles, in my knees, in my hips.. they all screamed for me to get out of stance.

I would go home, and start practicing just holding front stance. My husband came into the room, and watch me with a smile as I would go down into stance for about 3 breaths, and then stand right back up breathing hard to cope with the pain. "What's your problem?" he asked me with a grin "You're just standing up.. gee.. what's so hard about that?"

'O.K..." I said, "It's harder than it looks.. here.. you get into front stance, and see how long you last." I placed him in proper stance.. he didn't last any longer than me. His eyes widened in acknowledgement, and realization of just how difficult standing up can become.

As I progressed in the art I learned that Back stance hurts alot more than front stance.. HA HA HA HA Then I learned about the pain that can be achieved by going into Side stance. Phenomenal!

But my kata became stronger, and more stable.. my legs started to strengthen. Now I would turn on one of my favorite CD's, and hold stance through the song. Holding Front stance for 3 minutes, and 23 seconds, Holding Back stance for 2 minutes, and 40 seconds.. The whole time I'd sing along with the song, and focus on my breathing, even harmonizing.. anything to keep my mind off of the pain in my legs.

I build up in ability. I decided that I was ready for the real challenge. I washed the dishes holding side stance the whole time that I stood in front of the sink. Each sink load of dishes took about 5 minutes to wash. I would do a sink load once every hour holding stance each time. In a family the size of ours.. that's alot of dishes!

Then I started doing my ironing standing on one leg to improve my balance.

All of this personal training had an effect.. I was able to hold stance with confidence... but then the cramping started.

By the time I achieved my green belt, my muscles would cramp during class. I looked for reasons, explanations, interventions. My legs, and feet would cease in awful cramps as I tried to do kata... or hold stance. I remember how severe the cramps would be. In fact, my left leg cramped up really tight, and lost all power to hold my weight as I was doing Heian Yondan for my belt test in front of the judging table. I had to stop for a second, and place down my right leg to keep me standing, wait for the cramp to let go, and then continue my kata. I still passed that test in spite of this major mistake.

It wasn't until this September that I realized what it was that I was doing to encourage cramping in my muscles. I would often have a treat of Pepsi, and taco chips. It was my favorite bad habit. During the summer of this year.. I had decided to stop drinking, or eating anything with caffeine in it because of the reading that I had done about the negative effects that caffeine has on your body system. To my joy, I noticed that my muscle cramps had disappeared over the summer. I didn't realize the link to caffeine at that point though. However, when September rolled around, and the stress of my upcoming black belt test loomed over me, I fell back into my comfort food... pepsi, and taco chips. Within a month the cramps came back. AH! After some indepth study I learned that one of the effects of caffeine on your body is to strengthen muscle contractions. That is why the Olympic committee lists caffeine up there with steriods as a drug that isn't allowed in competition.

Now, I have been steering away from caffeine and my cramping has dissipated. I'm back to suffering from stance "normally".. ha ha ha

Countdown! 3........

The final moments before I face that BIG moment. My thoughts turn back to what I once was before I became infected with the positive effects of living Karate Do. I weighed nearly 200 lbs. I remember getting to the top of one flight of stairs and having to hold the wall because I felt dizzy, and weak. My skin condition covered over 80% of my body making it difficult to do anything. I remember finding blood spots on my pajamas from my hands independently scratching at the itch during the night while I slept. My face was covered which caused many people to react in abhorance when I approached them.

I remember the dread I felt at the thought of doing anything physical. Even the idea of walking to the corner store to get some milk made me think twice, or even three times. My 8 year old daughter wanted to take karate lessons.. oh man.. that meant walking a good 20 minutes each way. I remember moaning about that to my husband... Ha ha ha.. a 20 minute leisurely walk and I would complain about that! HA HA HA Little did I know then that, in less than 3 years, I'd be training hard for more than 2 hours straight with black and brown belts and exhilarating in it.

The first months of training were especially hard on me. I remember coming to a dead stand still while exercising during class. I heard Sensei chuckle and said "I'm not the only star that you are seeing right now.. am I?" I couldn't help but think in astonishment "How does he know that I'm seeing a whole bunch of flashing lights surrounding me?" Oh that was not a smart thing! Just jumping into hard karate training from doing no exercise at all. Looking back in retrospect, it's a good thing that I didn't consult a doctor.. ha ha ha.. He/she would have taken one look at my physical condition, and said "Are you crazy????", and that would have been that.. I would never have been introduced to the world of martial arts.

All I wanted was to learn how to do kata.. I was willing to do all the other things to be able to learn kata. I remember asking Sensei if it was possible to learn karate without learning how to fight. WAH ha ha ha! Little mouse that I was.. all that my partner would have to do is look like they were going to move forwards with a punch, and I'd hide behind my hands, and cringe saying "EEKK!".

Oh did I abhor push ups! Sensei would go down the line asking for the Japanese terms of the various techniques and those who didn't know the term would have to go down and do 10 push ups. I had plenty of motivation to learn my terms, if that is what it took to avoid push ups. Sensei couldn't stump me.. He tried.. oh gosh he tried to find an obscure term that he had taught me that I might have forgotten.. but nope. I fought valiantly against having to do those push ups.

I remember one time that Sensei asked a higher belt for a term.. and the person said in a joking manner "Why don't you ask her? " So Sensei turned to me with a smile and did the movement again. I bowed my head in embarrassment and said "Sensei, I am not familiar with that movement," ( I saw a look of triumph appear on Sensei's face) "but I do know one that is similar from Heian Yondan," I continued, " and that one is called Kaki waki Uke." The look of stunned surprise on the faces of all the other students was precious when Sensei burst out laughing and said "Yes.. it's the same."

I remember my first roundhouse kicks. I looked like I was attempting to imitate a Dutch windmill with my arms, and legs. Nothing worked together, and I'd end up collapse on the ground giggling into my knees with the joy of knowing that one day I was going to DO this kick... but right now, I look like "Goofy does karate".

Oh I'd get lost with every new thing that was introduced..It's like everything was reset back to the start... mentally, and physically. Sensei never stopped supporting, and challenging me to get beyond where I was at.. and I didn't stop giving myself permission to keep trying.

A difficult time arose for me. My father was ill, and dying. I found that training in karate helped me with the stress. I asked Sensei if I could attend both of his dojo so that I could burn off the extra emotions, and energy within me. He allowed me that priviledge, and I started double training. Innercity dojo, and then again at 17th Wing dojo.

My weight went down 30 pounds, my health went up.. Sure, I became sore, and my family would get no end of entertainment listening to my moans and groans from even little things like lifting my cup of tea to my lips.

When Innercity dojo closed down, I went into a deep concern for the fact that I didn't want to lose all of the physical conditioning that I worked so hard to gain. I requested Sensei's permission to attend a free kyokushin karate class that was offered every Friday, and received it.

I entered the kyokushin dojo with apprehension knowing that it was a full contact karate, and what a timid little mouse I felt like inside of me. I spoke with the Sensei there explaining that my main goal was to keep up my physical condition through the extra exercise, but that I would attempt to train Kyokushin while in his dojo...if he would allow me to train there. Thus humbly starts the difficult path of cross training in two arts about 2 years ago.

This little woman who couldn't climb one set of stairs without suffering is now training in karate almost every day of the week, and twice on Saturdays. She does weight lifting at home, and puts in about 22 hours of training per week (if she can steal that time from other things)

Only 5 days away

I'm trying not to get all uptight, and nervous about the upcoming test. Only 5 days away. I'm standing at the sink washing dishes, and finally keeping my mind busy with other thoughts when my little daughter comes in and says "Mommy! Your black belt test is only 5 days away.. Wow!" That number strikes into my mind like an alarm... Sheesh.

Bedtime, and my thoughts go towards.. "I wonder what will happen on that day. I wonder if I'll be able to cope with the nervousness.. I have to take it as "just another class"..but it's not just another class.. It's a black belt test. Oh gosh.. me? me? Yes.. of course me! That's why I've been training so hard all this time. I've got what it takes, I just have to let myself do it.. that's all... it's only 5 days away."

Deep breaths.. calm down. No need to get all uptight like the weeks before Christmas when I was a child, and I couldn't sleep because of all the thoughts of the presents that I'd be getting.. and daydreaming of what I'd find under the tree. I'm an adult now.. I can get beyond the excitement.. I can get past the anticipation. Oh I wonder if I'll see my friends at my belt test.. I wonder what it will be like to train under the new Master. I wonder if my muscles will cramp up that day or not... maybe I should make sure that I eat plenty of bananas on Thursday, and Friday before to make sure that I have enough potassium, and magnesium in my system.... only 5 days away.

This week is going to go by so fast.. and the testing will be over and done with before I know it.. and I'll be back to normal everyday training again. So I guess I should enjoy these final days of being extra energetic.

I've been watching my every step to make sure that I do not injure myself before my test. I've been extra paranoid that I'll catch a cold/flu before my test. I've been keeping track of how many hours of sleep I get.. it's only 5 days away, you know.

Snow, and Pain

It snowed immensely for a few days.. Our city was drowned in snow. Schools closed down, buses became stuck on the streets blocking traffic. The weather became one of the first topics that you would talk about with people.

We arrived at our dojo to find the parking lot unaccessible with wind driven drifts of snow. Driving down the side streets we couldn't find a safe place to park our car without the concern that we wouldn't be able to pull out again after class. Finally we found a safe place which was a good 10 minutes walk away from the dojo.

Against the wind we walked in single file sloughing through knee-high snow with our backpacks perched up on our shoulders.

We asked ourselves if we were the only ones crazy enough to show up to train today, but no.. there were 8 other karate students as nuts as us.

Class started, and within 15 minutes of training, my psoriasis skin condition flared up in pain. It felt like I was covered with boiling oil from my ankles to my neck. It HURT!

Oh I know why I flared up: When you combine the fact that the winter air is very dry, with the extra stress of the past 2 weeks of struggling with my autistic son everyday to do his homework, disciplining my 3 younger children to try to get them to clean their room for the past 2 days, being awakened by one of my daughters all last night due to "nightmares" thereby getting less than 3 hours sleep, and the stress of the oncoming black belt test which has been developing incrementally heavilly upon me for the past month. I'm not surprised that my skin condition flared with intensity.

I was in such pain that my hands were involuntarilly shaking. I wanted to break down in tears, and beg Sensei to allow me to pull out of class. I thought again about that over and over as I trained, but I realized that there is a big chance that I may flare up during seminar and testing. I have to be able to perform even with the pain filling my arms, torso, and legs each time I move.

I would meditate each time that we stopped moving. I'd close my eyes, and focus on my breathing, and tell myself.. "It's just pain from my skin. It won't kill me.. I can breath through it. I can do this.. I just need to focus even more."

We were nearing the end of class, and I was asked to perform my Bassai Dai kata. I mentally told myself.. "Don't focus on the pain.. focus on the movement of the muscles with the techniques.. on your breathing.. not the pain.. the pain isn't important.." I did my kata, and finished with a strong kiai.

Oh I need to rest, calm down, and put some moisturizing cream on me to be able to handle next week's test without as much pain. I'm just glad that through the combination of training in karate, and changing my diet to a healthier food combining method I have already healed over 60% of my skin condition naturally. I remember a time when my skin would have broken open throughout a class like this, and bled all over my gi, and maybe my opponent's gi in sparring. I didn't have to suffer that embarrasment this time.

One of my favorite martial arts humour sites

www.fudebakudo.com

I haven't read their books.. but if it's as enjoyable as the website, I can't WAIT to get my hands on one of them.

Their website has a martial arts advisor, who will help you choose the right art for you.. the questions are quite humorous!

There is so much to look at on this website: Downloadable origami paper slippers, how to avoid exhaustion through time wasting techniques, a well thought out answer to the whole "does Ki exist?" debate. If you want a good smile, even get to the point of laughing out loud, I would really suggest visiting this site. It's one of my favorite ones on the net.

I feel ready

Let's see.. we are only 5 classes away from the BIG moment for me, and I feel ready.

I've trained extra since July of this year, building up my skills, working on my balance, focusing on my progress, and last night I felt that inner solidity that told me that I'm mentally, and physically up to the challenge. It's a nice feeling to know that you have done what you could to prepare for something and to recheck it all, and find it adequate.

Now it's time to pamper myself, relax, and allow time to bring me to where I need to be.. In fact, I'm happilly anticipating the moment now. Sure, I realize that there is so much more to learn in my path of training in karate, but I feel secure in the base that I have built in the past years that I will be able to add onto what I have, and continue growing in my art.

I still have that healthy nervousness of anticipation... which is good, because one doesn't want to be apathetic, and over confident about the whole event.

There is something magical about the Shodan test that just cannot be recaptured by any succeeding black belt Dan tests. It's similar to the first time that you walk into that Junior High school. For years you were the senior student of the elementary school with the responsibilities, and priviledges, and now you walk in amoung all of these tall teenagers, and you feel like you are back in kindergarten again.

Bring on the challenge, I'm ready to face what happens, and live with the results.

Karate memories: Falling asleep at my belt test

I was going for my green belt ( 7th kyu). We had a 3 day seminar happening with Testing on Saturday. Our dojo was running a little concession stand to help raise money to support the students. On Friday night, we had sold out of all the homemade baking that was provided.

I went home after training, near 9:30 pm, and started baking. Muffins, cakes, cookies, brownies.. the oven had continual things going in, or coming out of it. Time marched on too quickly, and it was already 4 am when I stood there looking over a table full of baking with satisfaction. Sure.. I realized that this was the night before my belt test, but as a mother of 7 children, I have had more than plenty of "white nights" wherein I didn't sleep all night, and I was still able to cope the next day. How could this be any different?

The next morning I happilly brought in my baking to help supply the table, and then went to the gym to warm up. I didn't feel at all tired, just the excitement of being able to participate in this event. I enjoyed the seminar class with full energy.

It came time for testing. I was pretty happy with how I was coping with my lack of sleep. I forgot that there is a long, quiet time when the students are being lined up in order of their name, and rank. We sat there silent, and not moving.. I fought the sleepy blanket of calmness that took over my mind, and body, but the voices of the various Sensei melded into a warm mutter, and my eyelids drooped, then my head drooped. One of my dojo friends was sitting next to me, she nudged my arm to wake me up with the shocked words "Are you falling asleep????? Now? Ten minutes before you test?" The looks of shock, and awe surrounded me. Almost like their faces were teleprompters, they broadcasted the message "How can she not be nervous at a time like this? How can she fall asleep?"

I still smile at the memory of this moment. I will make sure that I get a good night's sleep before my Shodan test, if I have to have my husband smack me with a 2 by 4 to get that result.

Important enough to repeat it often..

There are as many different kinds of students out there in the martial arts world as there are personalities. Each person is unique, and brings a different flavour into the dojo. I've been thinking about "who" I want to be as I train: What kind of attitude, and performance I hope to achieve at each class.I hope some day to achieve the following

a) To approach every opportunity to train with a positive attitude, seeing within the repetition of movements the seeds of personal growth.

b) To challenge myself to apply my fullest energy to each technique.. as if it was the last one I could defend myself with regardless to how exhausted my body becomes with the effort.

c) To be willing to push myself to the point wherein I have to pull to the side of the dojo during class because I have no more to give.. not reserving strength to be able to last.

d) Having the humility to accept my mistakes, and limitations, and the wisdom to see a chance to improve them.

e) Cherishing the gift I have in a Sensei who has chosen to help guide my path in the martial arts by doing my best during class, and practicing what he has taught me in between classes.

f) Being grateful for the fact that I am able to train in karate.... that I have the health, breath, interest, and energy to do so in the first place.

g) When asked to instruct others, I want to teach them with knowledge, and not with derision. I want to respect the fact that they are relying on me to guide them properly, and to do my utmost to help them improve without making them feel lesser.

h) I want to be a source of support, and encouragement to others in my dojo. Energizing the room by responding to commands sharply, and properly. Kiai'ing with full spirit at the appropriate times. Keeping a focused attitude towards the execution of my techniques regardless of the behaviour of some students around me.

i) I want to be an example of self-control, and respect. Looking towards simple outward signs of having such an attitude like wearing a clean, ironed gi, with a well-tied obi, or placing my coat and shoes in a neat way at the entrance.

j) I want to have the inner flexibility to allow myself to enjoy karate, and yet manage to keep a serious demeanor. I want to respond to the needs of the moment, to be able to smile, and laugh.. and also to be focused, and centered when needed.

k) I want to be an extra emotional support to those women who chose to train in martial arts. Without being sexist, I would like to help women understand the different demands being placed upon them, and how to cope with them, as I struggle to find answers for myself.

L) I want to be open, friendly, and welcoming to new faces of the dojo, always keeping in mind how terrified I was on my first days of training.

m) I want to continue training well into my mature age.. keeping karate-do as part of my life until my last breath. Accepting the changes that time places on my body as a challenge to learn to adapt, and use what I have in the most efficient way possible.

If I can think of anything else that I am hoping to develop.. I will add it later.

The Joy of teaching

I believe that I've been born with the love of teaching. One of the most enjoyable games that I played was to place all of my toys in order, and to "teach" them school.

As I attended school myself, I was always the student that everyone turned to for tutoring on their confusion.

I have always felt a joy within me when I was able to help someone learn something that they didn't know before, or when I could help someone succeed at their goals.

So, enter this lady into a karate dojo... It wasn't too long that this little white belt was watching a fellow white belt struggle by themselves with the technique they were learning. So, what did this "brand new to karate" woman do? She took the little bit of skill, and knowledge that she had acquired from listening to Sensei, approached her fellow student and said "I really don't know this any better than you, but maybe together we can figure it out. I remember Sensei saying that we need to do this.."

Well.. by orange belt ( 8th kyu), with only 6 months of experience in the arts, I was allowed to help introduce very simple basic techniques to the brand new students, especially the little ones under the age of 8 years old.

Unorthodox.. That is the start of the description of how I creatively recreated the way to teach the simple basics to little ones whose attention would shift every 10 seconds. At one point, to keep their focus, I said to the kids.. "O.K..! I want you to be like little trains.. Punch, punch.. punch.. punch.. choo.. choo.. choo.. choo..." Sensei happened to be walking past me at the time, and I received one of those LOOKS of "What the heck are you doing?".. and a quizzical "Choo.. choo ?" formation of his lips. Now that I look back at that moment with the knowledge of the arts that I have now, I can't help but laugh. However, back then, I was a Mom who was trying to teach little ones and to reach them on their level. I got results though! The kids responded well, and learned.

As I gained in understanding, and knowledge of the arts, I became more and more efficient as a helper to my fellow students. I do not see myself as a teacher anymore, but more as a support, and guide to helping the other person uncover the information within themselves that will bring them to their goal.

Oh I love this challenge! That look of realization that fills their eyes as they understand what it is that they are doing, and how to do it. The look of satisfaction as they go from awkward movements to confidence. The look of happiness as they come to enjoy karate as much as you.

The words of wisdom from my internet Sensei friend, Paul, fills my mind each time I face the challenge of helping my fellow students: "Teach with knowledge, and not derision." Yes! That is so right! That is the kind of Sempai that I chose to become. Thank you, Paul.

I can't believe that I'm doing this

On the advice of a very wise karate ka that I admire very much, I'm going to cut back on my training schedule before my test. Now.. as the date of my test is looming over my head, I feel so much inner pressure to ADD on more practice to my schedule, not take away practice. But he has warned me that too many Shodans will overtrain before their test, and then perform very weakly and not do well at all.

O.K. let's see.. I would have to remove my weight lifting. Every Tues., Thurs., and Sunday night I would do 45 minutes of upper body weight lifting with 3 pound weights. O.K.. I understand that my muscles are overloaded, and need to repair and heal. Alright.. I'll let that go until after my test. ... and I guess that the 30 minutes of conditioning will have to go on those nights too then. The 100 sit ups, and 50 regular push ups, 20 knuckle push ups, and the tricep lift thingies too. BUT... I can replace it with stretching. can't I? Stretching is supposed to help muscles reconnect, and heal. Perhaps I can do some relaxed stretching during that time that I've slotted for home training.

I guess that my special Sunday night training of kata, and Bo staff is going to have to go, also. Oh no.. no.. I'll half it to an half hour for each, but not gone. I don't want to lose that part. Maybe I can just do the kata in slow speed. It can't be too bad to just do the Bo staff warm up lightly.. just to keep the feel of the Bo in my hands.

I'll bring down my kicking practice to 10 kicks per side. I can't help thinking "Is this a good idea? Aren't I going to lose that which I worked so hard to gain?" but I'm going to trust in the experience, and wisdom of my friend. He's been there, done that more than once. He knows what needs to be done.

I've got to say that I feel a real inner pressure now. AARGH.. this is going against what I want to do. It's like reining in the head of a race horse before the finish line. I'm champing on the bit like crazy with that "Let me RUN!" feeling inside me.

Overdid it again

I went up to Sensei first thing, and told him the bad news that I've overtrained this week by attending seminar classes, regular classes, and training at home. I had exhausted myself. I was feeling so sore! I could even feel the tiny little muscles on the sides of my knees.. that's how bad it was. Any stance made my legs shake. I was always behind everyone during our exercises. I actually made the Sempai chuckle because everyone would be finished the last movement, and kiai.. and then you would hear me a few breaths later like a little tiny terrier barking.

Sensei paired us off.. and we had to do one step sparring. Oh I was sore.. so sore. I stood there in front of my opponent thinking "Hey.. maybe I should just let the punch land.. it will hurt less than blocking, and countering." Ha haha.. but then I
decided to keep trying.. keep training.. facing each one with the attitude "Just one more.. I can do just one more.." and deep breathing in those moments of not moving.

Attacking was difficult enough, but then it was my turn to defend... again I was slower than I should be because of my stiffness, and that feeling of reluctance to move because of the pain. I heard a little voice in my head say "I can't do this", and I grabbed that thought and said instead "No.. no.. don't go there.. What if? What if I could block, and counter again? What if I have it within me to do one more? Surely.. I can do it. Just one more.."

I had to convince myself that I could do one more with each successive partner. Class was just one moment of pain, after another moment. I said to myself "This too shall pass.." and kept going until the end.

I was facing my last opponent, and I pulled down into the depths of me, forcing energy from my innards, forcing my muscles to block and counter.. my knees to bend so that I can reach my target.. my kiai to come out and buoy me through it all. I held my counter attack with a feeling of satisfaction. I felt so good. Although physically I was at my weakest, spiritually I was flying sky high!

Officially feeling it today

Nurturing a sick daughter, getting lunches ready for 3 children, making sure the homeschooled son is doing his work, facing the hills of dishes, and mountains of laundry, finding the peanut butter container stashed behind the couch, sweeping lego, crayons, paper, crumbs off of the floor, realizing that I have yet to iron my gi for the noon karate class, Also becoming aware that it's past 10 am and I haven't eaten yet... I stopped for a few seconds to rest, and recuperate.

I have 7 minutes before I have to leave my home to go join class at seminar with Yaguchi Sensei. I have to walk the one hour trek to, and from the venue. The cost of my black belt test is making finances very very tight in my home. Then I return home, clean up more, make supper, and get ready for karate class tonight. I am One Tired Mommy.

Moments like this make you stop and ask yourself "Do I really want it that bad?"

Since my answer is still "Yes, it's worth it." Then I will stop typing, and start walking.

Innercity memories

My very first dojo was quite different from the average dojo. Situated in a high school, the students were mainly young teenagers that came of their own motivation to learn karate. They couldn't afford to pay for the lessons, in fact most of them couldn't afford to pay for the bus fare to and from the dojo. They would walk to class straight from school. We would do various fundraising activities to support the dojo. From spring cleaning people's yards, running concession stands at events, picking up litter at local street fairs, catering, and serving at functions, the dojo found money to pay for organization fees, tournament fees, testing fees, travel, and even a little bit to show our Sensei our gratitude. ( Not much though.. poor Sensei.. talking about working for peanuts.. there were times when Sensei taught for cupcakes, and rootbeer.)

These kids had heart, and did their best to work together to meet their goals. For example, One weekend, our dojo had traveled to go to a weekend seminar, and tournament. We made an event of it, bringing the kids to a campground a night early. During that evening, through silly play fighting, one of the teens accidently fell on top of another whose wrist bent the wrong way, and a bone broke in her wrist. The adult supervisors rushed her to the hospital, and found out that she needed a cast on her left arm. They didn't return to the campsite until near 2 am. The next morning, the girl insisted that she still wanted to participate in the tournament. She had inquired with the doctor if it would be possible, and he said that "yes, as long as she didn't do any sparring, that her hand didn't swell, and if it didn't hurt too much."

We showed up to the tournament, and informed our Sensei. The girl was begging him with her eyes to please allow her to compete in kata. With cautious permission, she was allowed to enter the event. You should have seen how the rest of the dojo teens supported her! She didn't take a breath in or out without one of the teens asking her if her hand was swelling, and if she felt fine, if she wanted something to eat or drink.

She went up to compete. At the end of her kata, the judges all gathered to discuss something. The discussion went on for a long, long time. Suddenly the girl turned around to face her dojo mates with a look of elated humour on her face. She pointed to her cast, and said conspiratorilly "They don't know how to mark my points...", and then she turned around to face the judges again.

All of us from Innercity dojo muffled our laughter. It ended up that the judges had to base her kata on her GOOD arm movements. This girl won the Bronze medal for her kata at her first tournament. I will always remember her example of courage, and dedication, and the awesome support shown to her by her dojo mates.

Moments like the one above happened often in our dojo. I believe it is because of the way this dojo existed. We didn't have access to our high school location during the summer months, so to train we would have to find a place. As long as we were willing to gather, Sensei was willing to teach us. We trained in the rain in the park, in the heat of the sun, in the artic temperatures of an overly air conditioned gym, in a bingo hall where we had to move over a hundred tables and chairs to the side, and then back into place, in a small church 15 foot by 15 foot room where Sensei had to stack his students.. Training in the local park was always an experience. People would actually come, and set up a picnic to watch us. Cars would drive by shouting something about karate. You'd never know what they said though because the wind would snatch away the words. Although we always did a preliminary sweep of the area for hazards such as glass, sticks, large stones, and dog droppings.. there was the occasional time when we'd miss something, and find it later during training. The funniest memory for me of this is when we were doing an intricate sparring exercise with our partner in Kildonan Park. It had started to rain. Sensei informed us that this is good training.. now we can learn to move so quickly that we can dodge inbetween the raindrops. Funny, but none of his students managed to achieve that feat that day. We all walked away with water dripping from our hair. As we were doing our exercise, one of the teen boys slipped with his right foot, and screamed out. The whole dojo stopped in concern.. "Oh no!" I thought instantly "He pulled a muscle because he slipped on the wet grass!" However, that was not the case. The boy got a look of utter disgust on his face, and he started wiping the heel of his foot on the grass in front of him. We all erupted in laughter. Sensei warned us all not to do our sparring practice in that end of the field from now on.

Sadly, for a variety of reasons this dojo had to close down. Sensei had thousands of students parade in front of him for the 7 years that this dojo existed. Sure, many did well in tournaments, bringing home gold, silver and bronze medals. More importantly, the students learned about themselves, and what they can achieve. In a area that has such a high drop out rate among teens, these students finished their grade 12, continued on in life to get good employment, and raise lovely families. Sensei challenged them to find their inner spirit.. and his students responded. We have all gained in our lives through our experiences in this dojo, and I am grateful for the fact that I was lucky enough to have participated in it.

Karate memories: When I became aware of my breath..

I was performing the Heian Yondan Kata at a Tournament. Right after the first kiai point, I turned and did the double block. Putting all effort possible into the two punches.. I noticed that there were puffs of air coming out of me. Delighted, my whole attention turned towards feeling that air come out of me as my techniques happened almost on their own. My thoughts turned to: "Ooooo... how wonderful! Each time I send a strike or block my body is tightening, and the air is puffing out of me on it's own. COOL! I didn't know that I can do that, am I supposed to be doing this? What a sensation!!!!" Since I became preoccupied with my breathing I ended up at the third knife hand totally forgetting which kata I was doing. I stood there in a state of not moving.. almost in pause.... trying to remember which kata I was on... Suddenly reawakening to the fact that I was in the middle of a tournament surrounded by 5 judges who will be giving me a score on my kata... I thought " Oh oh ! " Now my thoughts moved faster "Oh dear.. I'm in backstance.. with my left foot forwards.. which kata has that.. LOTS of them.. What do I do? How will I finish this?" As my mind searched for the next move, I stayed still, and calm. It felt like an eternity as I stood there holding my position. All of a sudden I felt my body suggesting a "feeling" of movement that fit with where I was paused. With the total abandon of the thought "it's better than nothing" I followed the suggestion of my body memory, and finished the kata quite well, with the proper techniques, and stances. To my astonishment, my kata performance won me the silver medal. I guess that I wasn't stuck in pause as long as I thought I had... or I did it with such style that it seemed to fit there? Either way, I became aware of my breathing, and I haven't been the same since.

Silly things to make you smile.. "Boot to the head" skit

Memories... Innercity dojo would travel together to each tournament in the same huge van that seated close to 16 people.. even more if you cheated the seatbelt laws a little.. We called it a "Dojo bus". When we arrived at the event location there was a tradition to listen to two things. First we had to listen to the "Ti Kwan Leap" skit.. and song, and then we listened to "Everybody was Kung fu fighting" song before we went to represent our Dojo. If you haven't ever heard of the "Ti Kwan Leap" skit I will now provide the transcript for your enjoyment:

Ti Kwan Leep


Teacher:
Approach, students. Close the circle at the feet of the master. You have come to me asking that I be your guide along the path of Ti Kwan Leep. But, be warned: To learn its ways, you must learn the ways of your own soul. Let us meditate upon this wisdom now. So: Aaaaaaooooommm......

Student1 (Ed Gruberman):
Uh, sir! Sir! (oo! oo!) Sir!

Teacher:
Who disturbs our meditation, as a pebble disturbs the stillness of the pond?

EG:
Me! Ed Gruberman?

Teacher:
E-Ed Gruberman?

EG:
Yeah, uh, no disrespect or nothin', but, like, uh, how long is this gonna take?

Teacher:
Ti Kwan Leep is not a path to a door, but a road leading forever towards the horizon.

EG:
So like, what, an hour or so?

Teacher:
No, no, we have not even begun upon the path. Ed Gruberman, you must learn patience.

EG:
Yeah yeah yeah, patience. How long will that take?

Teacher:
Time has no meaning. To a true student, a year is as a day.

EG:
A YEAR??? I wanna beat people up right now! I got the pajamas! Hah woo yah ooomm!

Teacher:
"Beat people up"...?

EG:
Yeah! Just show me all those nifty moves so I can start trashing bozos! That's all I came here for! YO ASTA STA STA!!! Pretty good, ey?

Teacher:
The only use of Ti Kwan Leep is self-defense. Do you know who said that? Ki Lo Ni, the great teacher.

EG:
Yeah? Well the best defense is a good offense, you know who said that? Mel, the cook on "Alice".

Teacher:
No, um...Ti Kwan Leep is the wine of purity, not the vinegar of hostility. Meditate upon this truth with us. Aaaaoooommm...

EG:
Listen, shrimp! All this fag talk is really starting to piss me off. Now, are you gonna show me some fancy moves, or am I gonna start wapin' the walls with you?

Teacher:
Ed Gruberman, you fail to grasp Ti Kwan Leep. Approach me that you might see.

EG:
All right! Finally some action!

Teacher:
Observe closely, class. Boot to the Head! (SH-ZOOMP!)

EG (drunkenly):
Owww! You booted me in the head!

Teacher:
You are lucky, Ed Gruberman. Few novices experience so much of Ti Kwan Leep so soon.

EG (quietly, to himself):
Ow, oh, my head!

Teacher:
Now we continue. Aaaaaoooommmm...

EG:
Hey! Hey, I wasn't ready! Come and get me now shorty, huh? Come on, are ya chicken?

Teacher:
Boot to the head! (SH-ZOOMP!)

EG (again, drunkenly):
Oww! Okay, now I'm ready, okay, now, come on, try it now.

Teacher:
Boot to the head! (SH-ZOOMP!)

EG:
Mind if I just lie down here for a minute?

Teacher:
Now class, we shall return to our...

Student2:
Master?

Teacher:
It is wrong to tip the vessel of knowledge, student.

Student2:
Many apologies, master. But I feel Ed Gruberman is not wholly wrong.

Teacher:
What do you mean?

Student2:
I want to boot some head, too.

Teacher:
Have you learned nothing from the lesson of Ed Gruberman?

Student2:
Yes, master. I have learned two things. First, that anger is a weapon only to one's opponent.

Teacher:
Very good.

Student2:
And secondly, get in the first shot. Boot to the head. (SH-ZOOMP!)

Teacher:
You missed.

Student2:
Uh, yeah. Well...

Teacher:
You too shall be honored to learn a lesson...

Student2:
You don't have to, you know. I-I gotta be going...

Teacher:
Boot to the head! (SH-ZOOMP!)

Student2 :
(agonizing pain) Oyyy oy oyyyy.... Oh....

Teacher:
Can anyone tell us what lesson has been learned here?

Student3:
Uh, yes, master. Not a single one of us could defeat you.

Teacher:
You gain wisdom, child.

Student3:
So we'll hafta gang up on ya! Get 'im guys!

(Teacher throws many 'Boot to the head!s' and 'SH-ZOOMP!s'.
There are many people groaning in pain.)


Teacher:
And now class, let us rejoin the mind to the body and gaze into the heart of the candle in meditation.

Unison:
Aaaaaoooommm....

Teacher:
Very good, class.


If you wish to listen to this skit, or to the accompanying song, you can find it at:

http://www.webguys.com/pdavis/karate/tikwanleep.html

In honor of my old dojo I will be listening to the traditional silly things on the morning of my Shodan test.